A Five Pointed Star of Chaos
by GothKat2SlashFan
Summary: [OLD, NOT VERY WELL WRITTEN, AND DISCONTINUED. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.] Based off 'Twilight: APH Style' and 'A Frying Pan to the Head' but NOT copied! Five different heroines, twi-bashing and violence. Also includes swearing.
1. Prologue

**Hi everybody! I'm taking a quick break from 'The Toad, the Wizard and the Nation' (but don't worry, I'm still writing it ^_^) and while looking through different APH crossovers I found two that are absolutely hilarious. They're called 'Twilight: APH Style' and 'A Frying Pan to the Head'. I recommend that you read them before reading this, since this is based off both of them. But this has more characters. Oh, and if anybody can come up with a better title, feel free to tell me in a review ^_~**

Prologue

I've never thought about how I'm going to die. Neither has my sister or any of my friends. But if you ask me, going out in a fight or instead of someone I love seems pretty good as dying goes.

…Then again, I'm only sixteen. Who the hell thinks about dying when you're sixteen? (Except for Cassie. Having a Dark Lord who's out to kill non-magic people kind of gives you a reason to think about death.)

I'm having this dinner/party with my friends and dad, and some random-ass vampire calls me out of nowhere. And my friends get called, too. Apparently, all our 'moms' have been taken hostage.

I pity the vampire more than our dad/moms, actually.

After telling our dads (the others wanted permisson just in case their dads (mom in Juliana and Haylie's case) disagreed with us taking out the trash, which they didn't) we took a plane back to Alice's old home and are now getting ready to go into a ballet studio where the vampire is with our moms (well, dad in Juliana's case, which technically means that both of Haylie's parents are gone…).

The thing is, Alice never took ballet. She's more into summoning and cursing and whatnot.

The vampires that live in Forks are animal drinkers so we're not allowed to mess with them. But this vampire bites humans, so he's fair game.

Armed with a water pipe, wand(s), dagger, shotgun and a frying pan, we were ready.

Bring it, bloodsucker, you are going to deal with the daughters of Remus Lupin and Sirius Black, Yao Wang and Ivan Braginsky, Alfred F. Jones and Arthur Kirkland, Matthew Williams, Gilbert Beilschmidt and Elizabeta Hédérváry. You are _so_ screwed.

**Yup, this is a three-fandom crossover! Don't worry, Voldemort's not coming to Forks (unless you want him to XD) but here are the five main charries:**

**Cassiopeia Stephanie Black: Sirius and Remus' daughter, has wavy black hair and blue eyes, is studious but adventurous, can talk in canine-speak (doesn't have a furry problem, but CAN talk to dogs. And her Animagus form is a Artic wolf).**

**Alice Jones: Alfred and Arthur's daughter, and has elbow-length, messy blonde hair, Alfred's blue eyes and glasses. She acts a lot like Arthur (including the magical ability) but can be loud, and is just as bad drunk as Arthur is. Did I mention that she laughs like Alfred?**

**Ann Braginsky: Yao and Ivan's daughter, has medium-length brown hair (usually in a braid) and violet eyes. Has her parents' violent tendencies, but is usually quiet…ish.**

**Juliana Beilschmidt: Elizabeta and Gilbert's daughter, is Haylie's half-sister. Wavy brown hair and red eyes, she's pretty loud and inherited Elizabeta's violent tendencies, as well as a love of beer and foul mouth.**

**Haylie Beilschmidt: The daughter of Matthew and Gilbert, Juliana's (slightly) younger half-sister. Thankfully, Juliana doesn't mind about Haylie's… strange conceivance. Gilbert divorced with Elizabeth about six months after Juliana was born, and the next year, Haylie was born. She has Gilbert's white hair down to her waist and purple-blue eyes, as well as glasses. She inherited Matthew's quieter nature, but has Gilbert's love of beer and tendency to call herself 'awesome'. But if you want to live, don't ask her, "Who?" Because that's a guaranteed bullet in the knee.**

**Oh and none of the countries are countries (unless you want them to be? Review and tell me ^_~), Voldemort does exist, Sirius and Remus _are_ wizards (and Remus' furry little problem is still there) but, unfortunately, they won't show up much. They're… doing something out of town for the Order.**


	2. Chapter 1

**Warnings: Nothing too graphic, language, rambling alert**

**GK2SF: Hi! HK15 taught me how to do the line (DANKE SO MUCH) and it is decided, the nation-tans are all nations! (Except not all the kids know it…) And sorry about the random middle name, I just felt like them ^_^"  
>…I feel like I'm almost crossing the border into Mary-Sueism. God help me… <strong>

**In case you forgot:  
>Haylie Beilschmidt: Prussia &amp; Canada's daughter<strong>  
><strong>Alice E. Jones: America &amp; England's daughter<br>Ann Braginskaya: Russia & China's daughter  
>Juliana Héderváry (or Beilschmidt): Prussia &amp; Hungary's daughter<br>Cassiopeia Stephanie Black: Sirius & Remus' daughter: **

* * *

><p>Chapter One<br>Haylie's POV

"You know, Haylie, you don't have to go." My 'mom' stood fidgeting outside the terminal. He's been like this since I told him and Dad that I was leaving, but can you really blame him? Then again, I 'do' want to get to know my half-sister better…

Yes, my mom is a guy.  
>Yes, he's gay.<br>Yes, he is actually my biological mother. He gave birth to me after 9 months.  
>No, I don't know how he did it. But it- ohmy<em>Gott<em>that'screepy, Kuma's just STARING at me…

Quickly looking away from Kumajiro, I looked back at my mom and sighed.  
>"Really, Mom, I'll be fine, besides it's not like I'm going to change my mind now," actually, I've changed it five times in the past few minutes, but he doesn't need to know that, "plus, I haven't met Juliana, y'know?" I grinned encouragingly at him.<p>

I may be glad to finally meet my sister, but that doesn't mean I'm not going to miss him and Dad. He looked at his thick brown hoodie (which was identical to mine, but mine went down to my knees), and looked like he wanted to relieve some of that 'famous' Canadian frustration. (Famous because he usually calmed down in a few minutes… fortunately for me, but not so fortunate for him.)

Sighing as well, he hugged me and said softly (softer than usual), "Okay, Hay, but don't forget to call or anything, and don't drink too much beer, okay?"  
>Nothing's better than my mom's hugs and reminders. It makes me feel warm- I'm not sure why, though.<p>

_"Flight 73 ready for departure."_

Seems like it's time to go, damn, time flies _so _unawesomely sometimes.

Leaving his hug, I patted Kumajirou and walked to the platform, but not without turning back and waving.

He brightened up and waved back, and not even Kuma forgetting his name again could have popped my bubble at that moment.

Walking through the plane, I spotted my seat to find that it was next to a window. Awesome!

The only unawesome bit was that the dude next to me kept trying to hit on- and _grope_- me. With a- completely unawesome- fake British accent. (I heard the girl behind me muttering something about 'bloody gits make the rest of us normal Brits sound so bloody stereotypical' and thought she sounded like an okay person. Not like the guy next to me.)

"Bloody hell, you're quite a pretty little lady. Would you like some tea?" Maple, I have to agree about the fake accent thing, I thought as I drank some of my awesome beer.

When the guy saw my beer he gasped and swiped it. (Right after I kicked him for trying to grope me.) "A proper young lady like you should not be drinking something like this!" The girl behind me (all I could see of her was her messy blonde hair and brown jacket) seemed to be trying to suppress giggles.

…Okay, that was it. This dude was pissing me off with his extreme unawesomeness. I grabbed my hockey stick (which wasn't as long as a normal one since my arms weren't exactly long enough, but at least it made it easier to carry) and whacked him in the head. Right before he dropped my beer.

But thank Gott I'm awesome, because I managed to catch it.

"That was completely unawesome, dude," I told him.

He seemed a little dazed, then he started screaming. Before I could do anything, however, a weird flash of light flashed past me from the girl behind and turned out to be… a pocketknife?

* * *

><p>Alice's POV<p>

"Need any help?" I called out. "No, thanks, I got it covered. Thanks for the awesome knife, though." I heard the girl in front call back. I grinned. Looks like this flight won't be a complete bore.

"Oh God-"

"Not the face-"

"Sweet Mary Mother of Jesus please save me!"

I heard thumping sounds and a few swishes. Ignoring the whimpers of pain and repeated cracking noises, I noticed something slightly interesting. The little git dropped the British accent…

Smack! Smack! Whap! Bonk!

* * *

><p>Haylie's POV<p>

After a couple moments, the girl behind me started chatting to me, seemingly unfazed by the blood. (I'm just glad not a lot of it had gotten on me, because Mom would've gotten annoyed at how fast I picked a fight- in my defense, the dummkopf started it.)

Coming back to reality, I asked the girl where her parents were. Apparently, her father somehow managed to get her seat number messed up, so she was sitting far away from her parents. After a few moments of my explaining why I was by myself (thankfully, she didn't seem to find my… 'birth' strange), she told me that we had a lot of things in common.

Turns out, Alice is my cousin. It's weird how much family I'm running into…

Uncle Alfred, my mom's twin brother, had apparently married a British dude named Arthur, who, like my mom, had given birth (somehow) to a girl. Turning around completely to get a better look at my newfound relative, I saw a blonde, blue-eyed girl, who was wearing glasses just like mine!

No one came down our aisle or anything, and some of the other passengers asked to move somewhere else. What, were we too awesome for them?

Alice and I swapped a couple of life stories to pass the time, and the similarities were pretty awesome…

* * *

><p>"Alice, where did you- oh God you're drunk aren't you?" My dad seemed completely shocked. I replied heatedly, "Nooo, I'm still sober, it's not MY bloody fault that some bloody wanker broke my glasses!" I started crying at the last bit, feeling embarrassed but furious at the same time. Mu dad looked extremely pissed off. Then he noticed something. "Alice, why's there blood on you?"<p>

* * *

><p>"Haylie, vhy can I smell beer?" Dad was trying to look stern but failed. Mom noticed the blood. "Who did you knock out this time?" he sighed. I shrugged. "It vasn't me, there vas a bar fight!"<p>

"She's so crazy and she thinks she's so awesome, but she seriously isn't-"

A blonde girl with an unawesome fake tan turned as pale as a ghost when her friends screamed and she saw me right behind her.

"Nien! You're the unawesome ones, how dare you insult the awesome Prussia?" I yelled, clutching a beer bottle.

* * *

><p>…Hmm, mom always said that I spoke German or had a Prussian accent when I was drunk or angry. I think I was a bit of both that time.<br>Whatever, apparently almost the exact same thing happened to Alice, can you believe that? I mean, what are the odds?

* * *

><p>Alice's POV<p>

Haylie and I looked rather similar- long hair in pigtails, glasses. However, her hair was silver and curly, while mine was blonde and incredibly messy (I blame genetics). We were dressed pretty differently, though- me in my signature bomber jacket, plain grey dress and black flats, while she wore a long brown hoodie, an iron cross around her neck, black pants and military boots, as far as I could tell.

When the plane landed, there was a clear pathway through the crowd, and a whole bunch of people looked terrified.

Although it could've been that the people were intimidated by our awesomeness, I don't think so. There was a really tall girl with brown hair hugging her (equally tall) father, while another man (woman? I couldn't really tell) smiled at her. Hearing a *whump* noise, I turned around to see Alice being hugged (she looked resigned, like she was used to it) by a man who looked a lot like Mom. As I was about to ask him if he was my uncle, I noticed a girl waving at me. "Haylie Beilschmidt?" I heard.  
>"See ya later Alice, I gotta run!" I called over my shoulder.<p>

"Oh mein Gott, that name is awesome!" Juliana exclaimed. After picking up my bag (and telling Elizabeta and Juliana all about the creeper; they were surprised when I told them he wasn't French), Elizabeta gave me a small chick, which was fluffy, yellow, and had an orange flower on its (her?) head. Smiling, Elizabeta explained, "I figured you'd miss Gilbird, so I bought you something to remind you of him. Pr- Gilbert really loved Gilbird, from what I remember…" she trailed off slightly. I hugged her. "Thanks, Elizabeta, I love this bird! I think I'll call it Ellie, after you!"

* * *

><p><strong>*Rewind*<strong>

* * *

><p>Alice's POV<p>

Walking out of the plane with Haylie, the crowd parted before us. Really, these people were so- *WHUMP*. "Oww, dad, you do know how strong you are, right?" I muttered. Dad- also known as Alfred F. Jones- grinned at me. "But that's because-" "-you're the hero," I finished for him. He grinned even wider. "Exactly!" Just then, Haylie ran off, yelling, "See ya later Alice, I gotta run!" I waved. "Bye!"

Just then, my (biological) mother came up, holding our luggage. "Honestly, Alfred, you didn't have to go rushing off like that," he huffed. Meet my biological mother (often just called 'father', or, if I'm annoyed at him, 'mom'), Arthur Kirkland/Jones.

He's got the same messy blond hair I have (although mine is longer), dark green eyes and thick eyebrows. It's scary when he gets mad, because his eyebrows get even thicker and there's this creepy aura around him… Come to think of it, that happens when dad's pissed off, too. Oh well…

"C'mon, let's put the stuff in the car and go see our new house!" Cue enthusiastic outburst from my dad.

Wait a sec…  
>"Dad? How did you get a house so quickly? I thought we'd be staying in a temporary flat or something?"<br>"Uh… well…" Dad looked flustered. Thankfully (for him) Father stepped in.  
>"Remember those few times Alfred and I went on trips? Well, one of our… friends helped us find a house. It's not too far from the school, either." During the time that they'd been explaining, we'd arrived at the car.<p>

"Wow…" was all I could say. It was… bright? The car (I couldn't even tell what kind it was, there was too much color) was painted bright red, dark blue and blindingly white. There were also what seemed to be flag stickers, (the US of A and the UK) but since they were the same color as the car, I couldn't really see. Father looked slightly embarrassed and annoyed, but Dad just dumped the luggage in and started the car. I guess he's used to that stuff…?

* * *

><p><strong>*Timeskip*<strong>

* * *

><p>Haylie's POV<p>

"Wow, you're the chief of police? Awesome!" I exclaimed, the newly named Ellie chirping cheerfully on my head. Juliana grinned. "Yeah, and Mom's really good at it!" A dark look suddenly crossed her face. "Those who didn't like having a woman as the chief… well, let's just say that they, uh, changed their minds."

Mental note to self: Don't piss off either Juliana or Elizabeta.

For the rest of the ride home, we talked about other stuff, like the best way to fend off creepers and some of the best kinds of yaoi mangas.

"We're here! Home sweet home!" Elizabeta said a short while later. Juliana and I both jumped out of the car, narrowly crashing into each other. Whoops…

"Are you two okay?" Elizabeta exclaimed, Ellie resting on her shoulder. "Yeah, Mom, we're both fine…" Juliana mumbled.

* * *

><p><strong>*Lazy-me-is-doing-a-TIMESKIP*<strong>

* * *

><p>"Wow… is this really my room? You two are the most awesome people ever!" I exclaimed.<p>

The room in question had Prussian blue walls, a few bookshelves, a desk, and a bed. The bedsheets was patterned with maple leaves and polar bears.

"Yep! It used to be an extra guest room, but we repainted it and all!" Juliana grinned.

"You know, you guys really didn't have to-"

"Of course we did, you're family!" Juliana hugged me.

"Girls, I have a surprise for you later, unpack your stuff now, okay?" Elizabeta left the room quickly, while Juliana helped me put some of my stuff away.

* * *

><p><strong>…Is it just me or are they acting a bit OOC? *panics*<strong>


	3. Chapter 2

**GK2SF: OH MY GOD I'M SORRY FOR CRAPPINESS AND SHORTNESS AND WELL GENERAL CRAPPINESS but the only reason this got written was because I couldn't sleep at 1 in the morning 'cause my braces hurt but *gasps for breath* yeah you probably don't want to know but since I have exams in FOUR days I won't write anything else for a while… sorry. Also, the Humvee/95 Chevy Tahoe were recommended by Heaven'sKnight15.**

**On another note, Voldemort _will_ show up… eventually. GerIta son, anyone?**

* * *

><p>Chapter Two<br>*Haylie's POV*

"Oh MAPLE this is the most awesome thing ever!" I stared at the Humvee, awestruck by the sheer awesomeness (and the mini missile launchers). Beside me, Juliana was having a similar reaction to an equally awesome 95 Chevy Tahoe tank.

Elizabeta had gone all out for the "family reunion", although I did wonder where she managed to buy both vehicles. Eh, whatever, I guess the Internet is just that awesome.

"Um, Mom… there's something I have to tell you…" Juliana said suddenly, looking sad, angry and embarrassed at the same time. "Yes? What is it, Julchen?" Elizabeta said, using what was probably a nickname for Juliana. Come to think of it, I've heard Dad call her that too…  
>"The Cullens think I'm a vampire." Juliana blurted out, her face turning slightly red. Wait, what?<br>"What? Vampires? You're not a vampire, right? That would be unawesome." I stated, feeling slightly confused.  
>"Aw, verdammt… sorry, Mom… can't we just tell her?" Juliana asked, red eyes wide and pleading.<br>"…I guess it would help her understand what she's going to face… but only about the Cullens, nothing else. And why didn't you tell me this before?" Elizabeta conceded.  
>"Oh, good. Um, well, because… it's not awesome and I think they've gotten more paranoid, plus they've kinda just noticed me, which is really weird and unawesome…" Juliana muttered.<br>Feeling very confused and out-of-place, I asked, "How about we go in first before continuing this discussion? It looks a bit like it's going to rain…"  
>"Oh, of course!" Elizabeta looked up and, noticing the darkening sky (whether because it was getting late or because there actually was going to be a storm I couldn't tell), hurried inside. Juliana and I quickly followed.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>~*Timeskip because I'm not bothered to write the Cullens-are-bloodsucking-sparkly-fairies explanation, although I might put it in a flashback or something in a later chapter. Also, the conversation takes place during dinner*~<strong>

* * *

><p>Sitting through a conversationexplanation about how the Cullens (Edward Cullen in particular) were "vegetarian vampires", who drank animal blood and sparkled in the sun really isn't that bad, since there's all sorts of interestingly awesome stories. Apparently Edtard (I will call him that from now on 'cause he seems unawesomely retarded to me) started hitting on Juliana a year or so ago until she hit him with her frying pan, then he started being a paranoid jackass and muttering things about her being a vampire and whatnot because she had red eyes.  
>"So that's where all your cosplay contacts went…" mused Elizabeta, before we went to bed.<br>"Haha, yeah, I didn't think you noticed…" Juliana grinned, before disappearing into her bedroom. "'Night!"

"Goodnight, Haylie. This must seem rather confusing to you, but just remember to try and stay away from that Edward Cullen boy at school, okay?" Elizabeta said, also going to her room.  
>"Sure! Good night!" I replied, doing the same thing and falling asleep almost on contact with my fluffy, bird-and-maple-leaf-patterned bed.<p>

It wasn't until a while later that I realized she called a century-or-so-old vampire a "boy". So many mysteries, so many secrets, such a short amount of time…


	4. Please Pass This On

The administrators of are as of June 4th going to be taking down Fics that have lemons or have extreme violence. Now I don't know about you but I think thats stupid. There are many wonderful fics that only have one or two lemons in them yet the plot itself is awesome! You can't just take down a 100,000+ word fic just because it has a lemon in a chapter that is only 1000 words long. Now I urge you all to read the petition below, sign it, and repost this to your own fics. Hopefully if we make enough noise everything will return to normal. Thank you.

Greetings to the fine folk that moderate our site.

Myself, along with many, have been writing and posting on your fine site for years now, some of the better examples of up and coming writers out there are now suddenly finding some of the stories we've come to love at risk of being removed without the chance to even rectify our errors.

For some, that means the permanent loss of a story. While I don't have anything that I believe violates your terms of use, there are those out there that are never able to recover a story in its original form, this is something I find to be almost worthy of a legal action, as while we cannot claim ownership of a character, the stories are OURS and simply destroying them is something that is inexcusable.

It's quite easy to simply add an MA rating, additional filters or even a simple requirement for a free membership to read the stories presented here, and would cut down on hateful anonymous reviews and posts at the same time, so I have to question as to why such a thing, in all this time, simply wasn't added.

If you're worried about falsification of a registration then have an appropriate disclaimer and then there can be no dispute, you took your steps and the PARENTS didn't monitor their children, if that is even your concern. If it is more of a personal view or desire then please at least let people know and give them a chance to remove a story that you and yours find offensive, most people on the site are actually rather cordial when it comes to such requests.

While I cannot say for sure if this letter will even reach those that may be willing to listen, of if it's more akin to a wide spectrum purge in preparation for something bigger, please understand that you are going to be looseing a LARGE number of your writers, and thus your income from a lack of readers if there is not some level of action taken to help with this situation.

For those that may agree with this, please feel free to sign on and send this to the support server, maybe we can get some movement on this.

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